Monday, November 7, 2011

Second-hand ADD

I grew up with the Marlboro Man. It may seem strange today, but I remember smoking sections on airplanes. As a result, you always expected to smell like cigarettes when you took a flight anywhere.

People smoked at their desks, in meetings, at restaurants, in their homes, in cars…just about everywhere.

Finally, they figured out that non-smokers didn’t want to smell your fumes; and that inhaling them might not be good for those around you.
Living with someone who has ADD can be trouble. The trouble ranges from jealousy to watching a loved-one suffer.

At the outset I must admit that being a victim of second-hand ADD might be more difficult for me than for most. I’m more than a little anal-retentive. I enjoy structure. A schedule puts me squarely in my comfort zone.

With that disclaimer behind me, I’d like to suggest some self-destructive behaviors I have observed in my ADD-afflicted friends.

1) Social activities – You love parties and going out. The social scene means lots of background noise. You are able to pick from a number of distractions. There is variety. There is no time limit. You can bounce from dancing to games to eating to conversations for hours.

2) Video games – Lots of movement, lights and sound. You are required to monitor a half-dozen elements of the scene at a time. And you are good at it.

3) Chats and phone calls – There is no performance expectation here, just hours of avoidance

And we lose sense of time when we engage in such behaviors. Note that there is nothing inherently wrong with any of the activities above. The problem comes when we engage in them in high doses.

Stephen R. Covey made millions talking about the Law of the Harvest. Essentially he taught that the things we invest our time in will determine our “crop” in life. And perhaps most important to our present discussion, when we say “Yes” to one thing in our schedule, we are automatically saying “No” to everything else. No matter what, the clock wins every time.

ADD-sufferers are prone to one or more of these self-destructive behaviors:

1) Lack of sleep

2) Lack of exercise

3) Skipping meals

4) Poor study habits

5) Poor work performance

The Law of the Harvest requires that we pay for our lack of attention to the above areas of our lives. To be sure you can cheat any or all of them for a time, but in the end you will pay what you owe.

If you have ADD, please keep an eye on them. Force yourself to devote adequate time to them. They will bring you misery if you don’t give them their due. You must sacrifice some of your discretionary time to them.

Giving your studies the scraps of your time will not cut it. You won’t get away with it.

Going to work exhausted is not fair to your employer.

And Mother Nature will remind you if you don’t take care of your body.

OK. I’ll leave you alone now.

Xoxo,

Dad

2 comments:

Que Sera said...

Does this ADD thing also involve forgetting where you parked the car? :)

Anonymous said...

Remote key locks have created a coping mechanism so it's hard to tell on that one.
Dad